you are like SNOW, it's cold and cruel to begin with, but it's somehow BEAUTIFUL, and you miss it when it's not there. and if you hold it in your hands close enough and long enough, it CHANGES, it melts.
HE WAS ANGRY, yes. Just that side of livid, in fact: but the more Draco spoke, the stronger Kol’s certainty grew that he was about to say something he could REGRET. Moreover, the bits he’d opened up had been slammed back down shut; the experiment in FRIENDSHIP having ended as quickly and inexplicably as it had began. Wordlessly, he took the letter, weighing it in his hand. A few sheafs of paper with a stiffer photo sandwiched in between. He’d liked the kid: dismal name, but he’d had a brightness about him the likes of which Kol hadn’t seen in a millennium. Tempted to crumple the envelope, he stayed his own hand – though just barely – and put the letter down on the table for later review. When he finally spoke, his voice was just as it had ALWAYS been: closed… disinterested. “No, Mate. You left without any inclination you’d be back, either. ––– NO MATTER, that. Turns out a thousand years of disappointment makes one more seem small.” Eyes cold, jaw tight, chin up, he had put his armor back on. He was disappointed in himself. Kol had never bothered with FRIENDS. There were witches who had their endless uses, and his family – who had their endless heartbreaks. His unlikely friendship with the young father had been one of his OWN DESIGN: the first in his life. It served him in ways neither social nor monetary; he’d simply liked being around the small family, even as he had tried to find a cure for the Malfoy matriarch. In the wake of that FAILURE, he’d swiftly lost the closest bit he’d had to FAMILY in his life. He was ANGRY, yes, but he was disappointed: an emotion well-familiar with his family. EVERYONE LEFT. He’d been reminded.
❛ don’t give me that BULLSHIT. ❜ draco, don’t do this, don’t let your anger get the better of you. even when he was in his younger years, anger was a better solution than worrying about any of his emotions. he would always think back to the times in 6th year, when he just locked himself in his bathroom SOBBING. that was also the same year that moaning myrtle had stumbled into his bathroom, accidentally took the wrong turn & got LOST, then she just found draco. it was the first person that he had opened up to in a really long time, & so was kol. now he was sitting in front of kol, more&more anger filling inside of him. ❛ i told you that i COULDN’T stay, & i was planning on telling you that i was leaving, but it was too hard. i didn’t know how to tell the only person that has ever shown me any sign of friendship&trust that i might not ever be coming back. truth be told, i didn’t WANT to come back. the only reason i came back was because of YOU. ❜ he loved his friend, & he doesn’t just throw around that word lightly. in fact he’s never really said it to too many people. it was mainly just astoria & his son, & now that his wife was dead, he had to be there for scorpius even more so. ❛ you’re my best mate, whether or not you want to be, & i’m really sorry that i didn’t tell you that i left. but you can’t stay angry at me for too long, what would you be without me ? ❜ he tried to lighten the situation, but with the way that his friend was sitting & staring at him, there was NO way that he could lighten it. he didn’t want to lose his friend, he would rather cut off his own arm than lose kol. so, there was only one thing that he could do, & that was build up enough courage before opening his mouth, ❛ i LOVE you, kol, i wouldn’t leave you. i don’t mean, ‘i love you’, in that way i mean it in the, ‘that’s my mate’, kind of way, just to CLARIFY. ❜
there was a long& almost painful silence between the two boys, months had gone by without speaking to each other. there was nothing more than a, ‘are you going to come over tomorrow ? i want to show you this movie that i found, you’re going to love it ! ’ & the actual decency of draco to go, ‘of course.’ it wasn’t that he wanted to leave, but he didn’t have the heart to tell kol that he was leaving. he didn’t have the knowledge that everyone left him, & he wasn’t going to blame kol for not telling him that stuff. he just wished that he KNEW. ❛ i got all your letters, i just didn’t know how to answer them. ❜ that wasn’t the best way to start a conversation. he knew that it wasn’t the best thing to say, but he had just said it. there was one letter that particularly broke draco’s heart, & all it said was—— ‘are you okay ? ‘ ❛ i didn’t think that you were going to be MAD, i thought that you would be happy that i’m back. not for too long though, just until christmas, that’s when scorpius gets back from hogwarts. ❜ he reaches into his bag, pulling out a small envelope for him, an envelope filled with a letter, but it wasn’t from him. ❛ scorp wanted me to give this to you, he also put a picture in there, it’s a moving one too. i don’t think that you have any of those. ❜ he tried to make things better, but NOTHING was going to work. he wanted to have him not hate him, but draco had almost ruined everything. ❛ look, if you aren’t going to talk to me, then at least let me talk. astoria died, i didn’t want to talk to anyone & we had to go back. i told you in the beginning of this friendship that it was just for the summer anyways. so it was a wakeup call that i had to get us back to england, i don’t see why you’re so mad. you are overreacting, it’s not like i left without any intentions of ever coming back. ❜
THE WAITER, JACOB, pushed through to the kitchen with licked-clean plates in his hands, saying that Mister Big Shot was there again. She’d noticed him even before he’d been given the nickname: quiet, well-pressed, with pale eyes taking in the restaurant from whichever table at which he landed. He wore a ring on his finger, though no one came into the dining room with him, but –– perhaps stranger than all else –– none of the girls in the dining room had ever claimed he’d been untoward or forward in the least. Wiping her hands on the towel tucked into her apron, Tiana smiled, grabbing a plate of beignets from the cooling rack and making her way out into the main dining room. Though they were nearing closing time, there were enough stragglers around to keep the atmosphere warm. Tiana grinned at each of them, greeting her regulars by name and wishing the others a good night and good eating. She smiled as she reached Mister Big Shot’s table, pushing the plate –– and the large bill –– in front of him. “I hear you like my cooking,” she said, her smile not leaving her face. “I’m glad to hear that, as I treat my guests as family, and I always want my family going home with full bellies and smiles.” She pulled a small, unfolded box out of her apron pocket, assembled it, and began placing the beignets in the box. “I can’t take your money,” she said. “That’s simply too much for a simple meal. But I’ve seen you around an awful lot–– why don’t you repay me by telling me a little bit about you and that accent you come with? It’s certainly not from theses parts, and I’m betting there’s a story with it.”
he was about to leave, but that was when a woman came up, & he smiled at her words. ❛ never had cooking like that in my life. neither my wife or i actually cook, so we’re used to the same tastes. ❜ he explained, shrugging his shoulders. the house elves make the favorites of the malfoy’s, which was pretty much the same thing every night. that was one of the reasons why draco loved to come here, he got FLAVORS. ❛ oh, miss. tiana, you must keep the money i—– ❜ he stopped himself, hearing her speak once more. did she really want to talk to him ? he smiled, nodding his head as he motioned for the seat across from him. ❛ draco malfoy, i’m from great britain but my wife & i took our son here on vaction & just ended up falling in love with the place. he has to start school soon, so we have to move back. this is probably what i’m going to miss the most though, i’m just glad that i’m naturally a THIN person, i’ve probably eaten a hundred pounds worth of your food. ❜ there was a laugh that escaped his lips, making him shake his head slightly. ❛ i have taken my wife here one, her name is astoria, & i came with my son, scorpius. he loved your um . . . the powdered things ? he was asking for me to ask you if you can bring those to his birthday party, but i didn’t want to trouble you too much. ❜ he said, & he reached over for the money that he had tried to give her, but she didn’t take it. ❛ i can’t seem to think that me talking about myself is enough to repay you ! there must be something else. ❜
there were no words to describe how happy a simple RESTAURANT could make draco feel. he went here at the very least, once a week, & he was saying at the LEAST. he didn’t know what it was, but there was just something about this place. there was music, there was laughter, & the FOOD was amazing. he felt happy here for some reason, which is why he always stayed until practically closing. now, that is exactly what he was doing, slowly eating the dessert that was in front of him. when the waiter arrived with his check, he reached over, pulling out the muggle money that he had brought. ❛ that is for the food, &that, ❜ he pointed towards the extra HUNDRED that he had placed. ❛ it’s for the chef, tiana is her name right ? give that to her, & tell her that if she makes more like that, then she’ll just have to get more. ❜ he smiled, running his fingers through his hair as he started to clean himself slightly.
he’s careful as he watches the other’s every reaction , his palms sweaty underneath his gloves . it’s odd how he still keens on wearing them — habit, he supposes — although it’s not quite the same anymore . his body hurts too much from life ; nothing is the same . hans shakes his head slowly, smiling a little through the darkness , ❛ i’m fine , draco . don’t be sorry . ❜ he tugs one glove away and thumbs his naked fingers down draco’s strands of white hair , pushing them back . he wants to see the dilation in the other’s eyes : determined how scared the younger male truly is . at the demand , hans merely hesitates , as he usually does , before he pulls back , looking at the chair near the window — overlooking the bed . ❛ i can sit there . ❜
he tenses when his hand touches his hair, but he doesn’t meet his eyes. instead, they travel to where hans was looking, & he just purses his lips. ❛ you could just sit here, if you want to be comfortable or something. ❜ in all fairness, draco was more than tired and he was ready for bed, but there were the memories of hans DYING still replaying in his mind, & it would just come back every time he closed his eyes. he didn’t want him to be uncomfortable at the suggestion for hans to sleep in his bed, in all honesty, draco was uncomfortable with that idea. he didn’t LIKE being close to people, whether it be physically or emotionally. but for some reason, his friend seems to change that. ❛ i understand if you don’t want to do that or think that is–––– wrong. i just want to know that you’re HERE. ❜
he couldn’t believe the way that he was acting at the moment, as he just wanted hans to be WITH him. although that could sound wrong to many people that heard, & merlin, if his father had ever heard that come out of his mouth. he would probably send either him or hans away–––– he was supposed to be straight, obviously. ❛ i don’t want you to be uncomfortable i just––– i was never good with sleeping ALONE. i haven’t slept in my own room in ages, you know, since hogwarts anyways. ❜ at least, he hasn’t slept in his room that he was comfortable in. he didn’t like his room at home, his house was DARK, & he hated it more than anything, if he was beign honest.
❛ you know, i never had a REAL valentine before. astoria doesn’t really celebrate it. i think that scorpius should find one this year as well, he is getting to that age. ❜ he & kol had just finished a movie that draco had, for the first time, actually liked. he couldn’t remember the name of it, mainly because kol was YAPPING in his ear about it every five minutes, but he didn’t mind too much. ❛ i was a prick in hogwarts, so the only girl that ever wanted to date me was this one, & she was just OBSESSED. so, the most i did was ruin valentines day for everyone else. ❜ then, an idea came into his head. ❛ do you want to ruin someones valentines day ? ❜
he thought that moving into a home with hans would be GREAT, & it was. however, the man had stayed up late doing who knows what, & heard screaming from draco’s room. the next thing he knew, the blond was awake and breathing heavily, looking up at him with scared eyes, having them dart around everywhere. ❛ y-you died. ❜ it was his biggest fear throughout the war, & he wasn’t about to admit that this nightmare had happened more than ONCE. ❛ no i just, i’m sorry i’m just––– ❜ he didn’t know how to voice his fears, his problems, anything. ❛ can you just like, not leave or something? ❜
